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I strive to transform my own life experience as a chinese artist in the western world into

I strive to transform my own life experience as a Chinese artist in the western world into

sculptural representations of my own“un”traditional fairytales just as glass has the ability

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to transform as a material. There is innate terror in the body turned against itself.

Imagine you are lucid, eyes open, heart pounding, but you cannot move. you are

powerless against the visions that torment me and each moment increases the crushing

pressure on my chest. You are alone with my fear, a victim of this mysterious disconnect

between mind and body. I discovered glass at a moment when chronic sleep paralysis

was my nightly torment. This material, volatile and molten, became my passion.

Something that I could gradually learn to gain control of while suffering through the lack

of control the sleep paralysis was imposing upon my psyche. I felt its tremendous power

and it inspired me to change my life. I devoted myself to technical exploration and in

doing so found my direction. This figurative material transfixed me and has taken me on

a journey to transform my nightmares into something both tangible and hauntingly

beautiful.

I will create two forms of written dissemination of my work, the first of these is manifesto

the second part will be three different storyline and concept to give viewers who have

not experienced these nightmares”,

What is sleep paralysis, Sleep paralysis is when you wake up and your body’s

paralyzed and you start to go into like a paralytic shock.

As a visual artist, when come cross with sleep paralysis I have been exploring

surrealism, phenomenology and mythology, they have fascination within myself”,

For human sleep is primary behavior, it is an individual experience for everyone. Thus”,

every

As an international student study in the states unconsciously and increasingly

influenced by the stresses of academic life, it is very important to pay close attention to

that, while sleep paralysis may cause mental disorders, it is unusual phenomenon, it

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also help as yet another reason facilitate metal and physical well-being in campus.

The desired outcome of both these forms of dissemination is that it will help me

improving on my emotional sate since I am mentally aware of my dreams and such they

are not as terrifying any more and they do not come as often.

Glass is a medium where you can express rational and irrational thoughts even dreams

through three dimensions and I would like to show what happens in my brain to my

viewers.

Idea: The figure that I have experienced during sleep paralysis have been formally

dressed with the strange rabbit shaped face. So human-like rabbit and costume

kind of things really play along with my experiences during sleep paralysis. When I

create the glass sculpture, it is almost like experiencing again but in a different space

where I am able to analyze it and not be paralyzed understand what I am actually

doing.

Concept

1. I use enamels to draw symbols like a ladder as a connection between my

brain and body, the clock angel and devil represent time could be doubleblade

sword.

2. Part of drawing inspirations are from the texture of rotten fruits and

animals.

3. I had a memorable relationship in U.S with my ex-girlfriend. She is from

Japan, when she left U.S, we gave each other a toy rabbit as memory. So the

rabbit toy is full of my memory between her and myself.

Brief: This work I want to express the feeling of escaping from own body. Every night the

physical and mental torment happens over and over again,so that pushes my mental

pain to break out of my own body.

July 3, 2013

a stranger appearing in sleep paralysis, I remember waking up from a creepy dream”,

and lying in my bed for a minute, then my Korean roommate opened the door and I

could see his silhouette, was he there to comfort me possibly? he did not anything, then

he eerily hobbled into my room, and started looking a little more creepy, he looked a

little a creature form where the wild things are, I could only see the dark outline of his

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body and head, but his hair appeared messy and his head looked larger than normal, I

was on the top bunk and my another roommate was asleep below. My Korean

roommate stood at my bed and his head was about level with my own, he stood there

for a minute at the side of my bunkbed, and I could begin to sense that things were

weird, then, he reached out and started tickling me a little, I was not freaked out quite

yet, then I began to feel uncomfortable, but the tickling intensified, he began grunting

quietly, almost as if he was murmuring something, finally I was trying to tell her to stop

but of course, words were impossible to form, the tickling intensified until he was

scratching and jabbing and digging at my torso by then the grunting had eventually

grown into a deep growling and howling, I could not move or make any noise, why

would not my another roommate wake up and help me?! Scariest thing that ever

happened to me.

July 14, 2013

After I was tired from playing my phone game and laid down and got ready for bed, I

remember not being able to move although I was completely awake, and white bluish

light coming from around my bed and lighting up the room, when I was able to move my

eyeballs for a moment and saw four alien figures at the corners of my bed, I felt as

though the room was moving and I was being abducted, as the aliens started coming

closer to my paralyzed body I fought through the paralysis and immediately got up, my

body was in cold sweats and I turned on all the lights in my room, for a while I was

trying to fight off the notion that what I actually happened to me was real.

July 22″,2013

I remember waking up and hearing really loud “scrapping sound”, I thought it was my

American roommate, because he had bruxism at night, I tried moving, but I could not do

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anything at all, I could bare breathe, I could not close my eyes, I could not make any

sound at all, I was starting to panic, desperately trying to say something or just move a

little bit, the sound was getting louder and louder to the point that I could barely stand it.

I also started feeling pressure on my chest, that’s when I saw a strange head in front of

me( I was laying on my side all that time), I remember the head being male, skinny bald”,

its ears were sticking out and it had sort whiteish color, the head started talking to me”,

but the only thing it was “ you have to warn her”, after it said that, the head started to

fade away, after is was gone, I started regaining control of my body. I was completely

terrified and my heart was beating like crazy. I remember I went to my computer and just

typed something like “woke up and could not move at night”, I was kind relived when I

started reading about it.

Brief: When I was 19 I started to experience sleep paralysis, the torment gave me vary

hard time to moving my body even though my mental was waking up, but still

hallucinating “,I had to keep trying and waiting the time could let my body connects with

my mind, but the process would take so long to wake me up totally, so the time could be

the angel or devil.

Brief: This work is a part of my dream, during the dream I was running and

running in same place, no matter I was running fast or slow, this creature was

following me and I can not get rid of him. I want to give the viewer a glimpse

inside the strange and chilling qualities of a nonsensical nightmare, it is dark

cryptic mysterious and can even be dangerous and it is all based on my

personal experiences of literally being paralyzed with fear.

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