Bubble gum. All I remembered was bubble gum. I was searching and asking everyone where it had gone. I didn’t see the firefighters, take notice of the ash or smoke, process the ambulances- all I wanted to know is where my on earth my Looney Tunes bubble gum had gone.
On the night that my mother died, I didn’t know what death was. The day she was gone, I didn’t know what being alone was. The week my father mourned her death, I didn’t know what genuine sorrow was. For years after, I didn’t know what the world was.
Biting into the chewing gum and releasing a gush of saccharinity, sweet innocence and naivety caused me to see past the situation. Like the face of a tapestry, what I saw was wholesome and faultless.
As we grow older lives change significant ways. forced revaluate. incredibly disabling when all of a sudden, the many conclusions we believed as the absolute truth are swiftly exposed as misguided and false.
It wasn’t a game of hide and seek with my bubble gum, it was the night I lost my someone very important to me.
To grow up from child to an adult, but to completely awaken to the world around us. accept grief understand loss. As past my understanding has become clouded.
– I am still searching, but now can see the ash and I am struggling to breath in this smoke.
And all I can hope for – is of a child.
With constant curiosity a child explores. We often set a limit to our exploration, I believe we need to embrace our naivety and unleash our curiosity and completely obliterate the cat.
Our questions should be boundless. The who’s, what’s, why’s and where’s children never ask with the apprehension of judgement. Before we do something we make sure it is suitable norms of society. If not action is aborted and seen as taboo.
A child has a fresh conscious, which never becomes old, always remaining young encompassing their vivid imagination. Where adults see a simple hat- they envision an elephant engulfed in a boa constrictor. We often are unable to see beyond the simplicity of the drawing true creativity lives. put out, sharing our dreams blood sweated ideas only to be met with disappointment when people, as well as our selfs “don’t get” our boa-constrictor with an elephant inside. As through the mind of a child, never take in the negative criticism you hear and find your bubble gum amid the muck filled smoke.
Perhaps it’s safe to say that most people want to be happy. Often we find it hard, almost impossible to find true happiness and embrace the good within bad situations. Where I could have lived that night in fear, desperation and sorrow, the perception of a child helped me through my hardship and lead me in the search of my bubble gum.
I believe that the child mind is fascinating. They see things and ideas in a different way. They see only the good and find the bubble gum in this world that seems to be failing us at the moment. They might not see the entire world through their little eyes, but they sure do see what’s right.
Today my mother has passed on, I understand is fleeting. Now that’s she gone, I know beauty thriving this world alone. Everyday we mourn our brothers and sisters who perished in the Holocaust, I know what gratitude is. Until the day I die, I won’t know all that the world accommodates”,
I haven’t been able to find my bubble gum.
And I sure do hope, you haven’t found yours